The Joy of Boys

The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas. Things I’ve learned from my boys (honest and not kidding):

1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep

2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3.) An 3-year old boy’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 ft. room.

5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words “uh oh”, it’s already too late.

8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke — lots of it.

9.) A six-year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.

10.) Certain Lego’s will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old boy.

11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence

12.) Super glue is forever.

13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.

14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15.) VCR’s do not eject “PB & J” sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.

21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22.) The spin cycle on the washing machine will, however, make cats dizzy

23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24.) 80% of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

25.) 80% of women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kid.

a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical.

b) For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious.

c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.

d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.

e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.

Families with Purpose

Do I Light Up?

I was watching Oprah yesterday and it was a show on viewers’ favorite show picks for the past twenty years. One segment was about a “biker” Dad who saw a portion of Oprah’s 20th Anniversary DVD Collection and how that segment changed his relationship with his children. The clip that inspired him was a conversation between Toni Morrison and Oprah in which Toni asks parents - “When a kid walks in the room—your child, or anybody else’s child—does your face light up?” So of course this got me to thinking? Do I light up?

Not a day goes by that I don’t tell each of my children (I have 4) how much I love them. I grew up not being told much that I was loved. Don’t get me wrong, I always knew I was loved, my parents just weren’t very verbal about it. It was considered spoiling to tell a child too much that you loved them. So I made a promise to myself that I would make it a part of life to let my kids know how much they meant to me. But is telling them you love them enough? Did I actually “light up” when they entered the room?

Well after a little bit of honest reflecting, I realized that I didn’t always “light up” — something my 7 year old daughter has been trying to tell me lately. My 7 year old is very sensitive to my moods. As she says “I like it when you’re happy” and when I’m not she’s not. As like every other parent, sometimes the pressures from everyday life of working, taking care of kids and family, cleaning the house, and paying the bills can take their toll on me emotionally. I often don’t sleep if feeling overwhelmed and stressed and believe me, I need my sleep. And the culmination of all these things sometimes causes me not to be in the mood to “light up”.

So in an effort to be a little more “happy” and “light up” more, and out of the incredible love and respect I have for my daughters, I think I’ll try to lighten up a bit and not stress when the bathrooms don’t get cleaned. Afterall, I don’t think it’s going to be the clean bathrooms that my daughters remember.

Do you “light up”? Remember, your kids will thank you for those little things later.

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