Goal Setting=School Success

By Susan Heid of The Confident Mom

Do you know where your child typically gets his academic motivation from???

For the most part, it is you!  As parents, we have a huge role in influencing our child’s desire to learn and create lifelong habits in the process.

I have to admit; I had not really given goal setting much thought as a parent, until recently.  Both of my older children have truly never struggled in school.  They have easily motivated themselves and been determined to do their best work from an early age. I must have contributed something to these characteristics, but obviously I wasn’t that intentional about it.

Along comes child number three, and as parents we are a little more challenged.  We received a report card just before the holidays and have decided it is time to set some specific goals together with him to hopefully narrow down some specific areas for him to focus on.

Goal setting is a great life skill and it is never too early to start.

Why Set Goals?
In order to succeed in school and in life, children need to develop the skill of self-determination as well as self-motivation.  In other words, they need to be able to make their own decisions, guide their own behavior and take responsibility for their choices. Setting goals can facilitate this process because it helps kids make the connection between their own personal choices and the end results.

Creating Goals

You can begin a discussion of goal-setting simply by asking your child what he hopes to accomplish. While you might have a few suggestions in mind, you’ll want to let this idea percolate for a few days.  It is amazing the difference that can come when you allow your child to be involved in this conversation.  If he feels really heard, they feel more a part of the solution rather than you just telling them what they must do. You might even be surprised to find that the expectations your child has for himself or herself are higher than you imagined.

Developing a Plan

Once your child picks one or two areas to focus on, you’ll want to help him or her develop a plan for accomplishing it. This will most likely include defining the goal, setting a time frame, and making a list of ACTION steps necessary in working toward the goal. You’ll also want to talk about how your child will realize that the goal has been accomplished.  For example:  Our child has an issue with not turning homework in on time, so the goal now is to turn in homework on time.  We then brainstormed ways he could take steps to make this happen, these are the ACTION steps.  Then we decided a time frame to review how we were doing with the goal.  We will review this goal in one month and make any adjustments necessary.

To Reward or Not to Reward

Try to avoid the temptation to dangle financial or tangible rewards in front of your child to achieve success.  The idea behind setting goals is for your child to get a sense of personal achievement that comes from reaching goals.  If your child is always looking for outside rewards to keep him motivated his chance of success in the real world could be quite challenging. Instead, allow your child’s feelings of personal accomplishment to be its own reward.

Celebrating Success

Make sure you acknowledge the work you see your child doing along with way!  Being specific with praise will inspire your child to continue to move forward.  Instead of a “Good job” – let your child know that you see the time and energy he expended in doing his best work the first time. Knowing that you noticed will increase your child’s sense of accomplishment and fortify his or her self-determination.

What goals do you think you could help your child set?  How can you support him to reach those goals?

Susan Heid loves inspiring Christian moms to make small changes managing their home and family life giving them more time, order and less stress! As a Certified Parent Coach and Family Manager Coach she enjoys sharing her expertise with moms through workshops, teleseminars, public speaking, and individual and group coaching.  She is a proud mom, step-mom and foster mom to 3, married to her very own prince charming, loves coffee, cloudy days, and does think the “bluest skies you’ve ever seen are in Seattle.”  Make sure you get a copy of her FREE ebook, “Getting Kids to Cooperate and Become Team Players.”

Making Your 2011 Goals Happen

Laura Rolands of My Attention Coach

Did you set goals in the beginning of the year?  Maybe you called them resolutions?  Whatever the name, it is necessary to follow up on them to help make sure they happen.

Maybe you set family goals, professional goals or other personal goals.  Whatever goals you have for yourself, action plans and measuring success are key to achieving your success.  Read on for tips on using action plans and measurements to help make your 2011 goals happen.

Action Plans

After setting and prioritizing your goals, your next step is to establish an effective action plan.  It is important to identify the steps you need to take to reach your goals so you have a good roadmap.  Identifying the steps is not enough though.  Each step needs to have a due date associated with it to help you create momentum to move towards your goal.

When developing your action plans, focus on one goal at a time so that you can minimize the distractions to your plan.  Keep the following questions and tips in mind when developing your action plan:

• Take your strengths into consideration when making your action plan.
• How can you build on your strengths to implement your action plan?
• What behaviors are you willing to change or give up to achieve your goal?  Consider how open you are to making this change.
• Plan in small, manageable steps so that you can act on them in a reasonable amount of time.  Your plan will be less likely to overwhelm you.
• Post a checklist where you will see it and pay attention to it every day.

Measure Success

Keeping track of your progress can be motivating and help you create forward progress in many ways.  By keeping a measurement of your action plan and goal visible, you can keep your goal front and center with all of the other distractions in your life.  A line chart is sometimes very helpful with this.  By measuring your success you can also help to keep yourself motivated with positive feedback.

A few ways of measuring success include a chart, calendar or journal.  Even just writing a short note to yourself each day on a calendar can be helpful.

How are you doing on working towards your goals?   Let us know how we can help!

Laura Rolands is the founder of LSR Coaching and Consulting, LLC. She is a coach whose passion is to support, lead and inspire independence and success for people who have either been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD or who are facing other attention-related challenges. Her clients include individuals with attention-related challenges and/or their parents. If you have any questions or more suggestions to add, please visit her website at www.MyAttentionCoach.com.

Hit the Rewind Button and Achieve Your Goals

By Jennifer Ascher of Organizing without Limits

It’s the end of February.  Have your New Year’s Resolutions fallen by the wayside and are all but forgotten?   One of the reasons that resolutions don’t work is because they are generally not specific enough, are focused around I want to… (Lose weight, get organized, get rid of debt etc.) and are made with no action plan as to how to go about accomplishing them.  So if resolutions don’t work, what is one to do?

You hit the rewind button and switch your resolutions to very specific, intentional goals. Setting up goals will help you accomplish what you set out to do because they …

• Are manageable and attainable
• Are specific and not vague
• Provide you with laser sharp focus
• Give you a sense of direction and purpose
• Require continuous action
• Give you long-term vision and short term motivation

Now that you know how setting goals will help you. Here are some action steps you can take towards achieving them.

1.       Get very specific with what you want it.

Make sure your goals are simple, clear and focused. Saying you want to get organized is way too broad and overwhelming.  Saying I want to organize my pantry is very specific, clear and meaningful.

2.       Know the Why.

Goals need to have a purpose. Make sure you truly understand why you are investing time and energy in accomplishing said goal. Without the why you will lose motivation and interest.

3.       Write it down, make it a priority and do 3-5 daily tasks that will bring you closer to your goals.

Writing out your goals is an important step to make them a reality. Think of it as a visualization and reinforcement for your brain to keep you from procrastinating and on task.. An easy way to do this is when you write out your to do list for the day. The very first thing on that list should be your goal and the 3-5 intentional, action focused tasks you need to do for the day specific to that goal.

4. Set deadlines and review.

You need a way to gauge your success and see if you are on track. By setting specific deadlines it will enable you to track your progress and adjust fire if need be.

5. Get Help.

If you are having a hard time and are not making progress.  Think about enlisting the help of a coach who can help you. Sometimes you need that support, accountability and guidance from an outside source to keep you on track and motivated. I see this in my clients all the time.

6. Never forget

To stay positive and that action + consistency = results.

Jennifer Ascher (better known as an Organizing Geek among her friends) Professional Organizer and founder of Organizing Without Limits started the company because of her sheer passion for organizing and helping other people. Being a busy mom and business owner, Jennifer understands the importance of getting and staying organized as well as efficient time management. With her hands-on approach Jennifer prides herself on being able to meet client’s needs on a personal level. It is her belief that organizing goes beyond pantries, closets or even time management.  It’s about taking control of your WHOLE LIFE.

Organizing Without Limits provides organizing solutions to transform your life and offers both hands-on and virtual organizing services. You can reach Jennifer at her website, as  well as on Twitter and Facebook.

Creative Valentine’s Day Gifts

By Beth Engelman and Jenna Riggs of Mommy on a Shoestring

Show the love this Valentine’s Day with these easy to make gifts, cards and crafts that will delight your kids and have your friends saying, “Are you sure you didn’t buy this?” Read more

Creating Trust With Our Children

By Sandra Huber of the The Soulful Parent

February is the month when we reflect on our relationships and their meaning.  We think about love and friendship and the relationships that we value in our lives.

When it comes to relationships and love, our children are definitely near the top of the list. It’s important to remember that we are our children’s first relationship experience and they learn a great deal about love and care and nurturing from their interaction with us. But how do we create that bond, that connection that is so essential for our children’s emotional well being?

In our fast-paced society, where there are a lot of distractions competing for a parent’s attention, forming a strong connection with our children is even more vital. To ensure our children have the best opportunity to reach their greatest potential, we need to create and maintain a strong bond and connection with them throughout their entire childhood, especially at those times when they seem less than “lovable”. We show them how to love and value themselves by being present for them and tending to their emotional needs.

How do you create that bond? By starting with a foundation of love and trust, we teach our kids to trust us by the way we respond to their needs from feeding them when they are hungry to getting the school supplies they need, to listening to them with our undivided attention.

I had the opportunity to practice this with our own 9-year-old daughter this week. She has been struggling with someone at school and is frustrated and angry. She tried to share her point of view and was clearly upset. My first instinct was to give her advice, to try to make it better, to help her find a solution. She kept on trying to get me to listen and because of my own discomfort at seeing her so upset, I wasn’t really listening. Finally she said “mama, is it Ok if you just listen to me and don’t’ tell me what to do? I really just want to tell you about it”.

I took a deep breath and realized that it was that bond, that connection that I have with her, that allowed her to ask me for what she needed. When I can be emotionally available to her and for her, I strengthen our bond, our connection, the trust she has in our relationship and its stability.

When we are consistent in our efforts to discipline, care for and love our children, they learn that the world is indeed a safe place where they can explore their emotions, try out scenarios and know they are loved no matter what. That is what unconditional love is all about!

Sandra is the “soul” and “coach” behind the Soulful Parent. She has worked in Early Intervention, Special Education and has supported many families in the road to successful parenting. She became a PCI Certified Parent Coach® because she’s deeply passionate about changing the world, one family at a time. Sandra believes that life becomes a more enjoyable journey when you lead from your strengths! She can be contacted Sandra {at} thesoulfulparent(.)com and www.thesoulfulparent.com for more information about seminars, presentations and individual coaching services.