Spring Checklist

Stay on top of things this spring with our free Spring Checklist.  Enjoy!

Key Characteristics of a Strong Family

By Susan Heid of The Confident Mom

A strong family unit rarely just develops without intentional action from within the four walls of a home.  As moms, we want our family to be close knit, but how do you get that connection?  By creating daily routines, making the best choices with your time as well as celebrating special traditions you can end up knitting your family together much easier than you think.

Eat Dinner Together

This is not new – especially if you have read some of my past posts. Family dinners are right at the top of my list to doing family “right”.  The conversation and involvement that develops during these times is irreplaceable.  How many nights do you eat together as a family?  If it is less than 4, you may want to consider why you are not.  If it’s not possible to have them every night, make sure that you eat together as a family at the dinner table at least four times a week. If you need to cut something out of your schedule to accomplish this, then do so.

Respect Each Other

Make a rule that all members of the family are treated with respect, everyone.  Often we as parents expect this respect but may not always give that respect to our children. Start by modeling this as a parent, then enforce the rule with your children. Do not allow siblings to be disrespectful to each other.  Speaking disrespectfully of or to others in the family is simply not allowed.

Family Night

Plan a family night at least twice a month. You can either stay home and play some board games, make a recipe together or have a movie night.  If you can set aside some of the family budget for an activity, go bowling or ice skating.  These activities will be memory makers and your kids will talk about them for years to come.

Practice Forgiveness

Forgive when necessary and lead by example. Nothing breaks up family unity faster than a grudge. If someone has done something wrong, get it out in the open, and then forgive that person. Teach your children how to do this with each other by allowing them to see you and your spouse work through disagreements.  This characteristic is a learned behavior which starts early in development.

Truly Listen

When was the last time you truly just “listened” to your child?  We think we are listening, but often times we are already thinking of what we are going to say back. When children know that their thoughts, opinions, and insights are valued, they tend to feel closer to their family members. During your family dinners and game nights, let everyone talk and make the others listen. Never underestimate the power of communication! Talking, listening, and responding is essential to building family unity.

Be At Home

Strong families recognize that there are benefits and pleasures to be gained from time and activities together.  Typically these types of activities are found at home.  If your busy schedule prevents you from being at home it will be difficult to create these opportunities.  Making intentional decisions to preserve time together for family activities and interactions is important. Remember that your family is your first priority. If you have to turn down an obligation in order to spend time with your family, do so!

Susan Heid loves inspiring Christian moms to make small changes managing their home and family life giving them more time, order and less stress! As a Certified Parent Coach and Family Manager Coach she enjoys sharing her expertise with moms through workshops, teleseminars, public speaking, and individual and group coaching.  She is a proud mom, step-mom and foster mom to 3, married to her very own prince charming, loves coffee, cloudy days, and does think the “bluest skies you’ve ever seen are in Seattle.”  Make sure you get a copy of her FREE ebook, “Getting Kids to Cooperate and Become Team Players.”

Listen to Me!

Laura Rolands of My Attention Coach

Are you frustrated when your kids don’t listen?  This is a common challenge for us parents and I see this frequently in my coaching.  Active listening provides many benefits in our relationships and in daily conversations.  By actively listening, you will better understand what is being discussed and be better equipped to provide valuable input at the appropriate time.  “But wait!” you say, “my child needs to listen better, not me!”  Understood.  I encourage you to consider a different viewpoint.  Often we may need to look at our own listening skills in order to improve those of our children.  Today, I share ideas for improving your own and your child’s listening skills.

Active Listening

Sometimes when someone else is speaking, you might spend time figuring out what you will say next and that can interfere with your understanding of the situation.  Or you might simply struggle to pay attention to what is being said.  You will gain more insight into discussions and have more meaningful input if you actively listen while the other person is speaking. There are steps you and your child can take, however, to  improve your active listening skills.

Practice Listening

Talk to your child when things are calm around the house.  Take turns telling each other something about a recent event.  Make it brief, but long enough to stretch your listening skills.  Two to four minutes is a good time length to start.  Let your child start so you can model the active listening.  When your child is done talking, reflect the story back to him or her and ask for feedback.  Discuss with your child what got in the way of your listening and brainstorm ways you can listen more actively in the future.  Then reverse roles and tell your child something of interest.  Help them to talk through the experience.  Practice this a few times each week and keep track of your listening skills to see if you notice any improvements.

Try Fidgeting

Perhaps you or your child drift off and lose focus while struggling to listen while someone is talking during a conversation or meeting.  Another activity to try is to fidget, which can work work people with or without ADHD.  One of my coaching colleagues, Sarah Wright and her co-author, Roland Rotz, wrote a book called Fidget to Focus.  Outwit Your Boredom: Sensory Strategies for Living With ADD (2005).  Their book explains that fidgeting means “any simultaneous sensory-motor stimulation strategy”.  The authors encourage using the active of fidgeting to keep your brain activated which will help you pay attention to what you need to pay attention to.  Examples of fidgeting include squeezing a stress ball, chewing gum, playing with pipe cleaners and even listening to music.

Laura Rolands is the founder of LSR Coaching and Consulting, LLC. She is a coach whose passion is to support, lead and inspire independence and success for people who have either been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD or who are facing other attention-related challenges. Her clients include individuals with attention-related challenges and/or their parents. If you have any questions or more suggestions to add, please visit her website at www.MyAttentionCoach.com.

Spring Crafts on a Shoestring

By Beth Engelman and Jenna Riggs of Mommy on a Shoestring

Have some springtime fun with these budget friendly crafts!

DIY Chia Pet

You will need:

• Plastic container
• Acrylic paint
• Soil
• Grass seeds (such as wheatgrass or rye)
• Craft items such as fun foam, googly eyes, buttons, etc to make the Chia’s face.

Directions

1. Paint the plastic container with several coats of paint.
2. When the paint dries, give your Chia a face and personality with buttons, fun foam, googly eyes etc.
3. Fill the container ¾ full with soil.
4. Add seeds and cover with soil.  Water and place in a sunny location. Green hair should emerge within 3-5 days.

Math Beach Ball Catch

Practice math facts while playing catch outside

Directions:

1. With a permanent marker, write numbers 1-10 (or as many as will fit) on a beach ball.
2. Players take turns playing catch with a “catch.”  Each time a player catches the ball ~ he has to add, subtract or multiply the 2 numbers that closest to his hands.
3. A great way to reinforce math skills and get the kids moving!

Bird Feeder

Welcome back our fair weathers friends with a special treat!

You will need:

• Recycled plastic bottle
• Wild birdseed
• Wooden spoons (or wooden dowels*)
• Peanut butter

Sharp scissors (adult use only)

*NOTE:  Dowels are available at most craft stores.

Directions:

1. Turn the bottle upside down.
2. Fill the Bottle with birdseed (3/4 full works best).
3. Use sharp scissors to poke a hole through the bottle on both sides.  ***Make sure an adult does this step!!
4. Push the wooden spoon or dowel through the hole.  This is where the bird will perch.
5. Cut a smaller hole (about 1/3 inch in diameter) directly above the spoon or dowel.  This is where the bird will get the seed.
6. If desired, add peanut butter and birdseed to one end of the spoon or dowel.
7. To add a second spoon, repeat steps 4-7.
8. To hang: poke 2 holes at the top of the feeder and thread wire or twine through each hole before tying into a loop.

Wrapping Paper Kite

You will need:

• 1 ~ 20 inch wooden dowel* or stick
• 1 ~ 24 inch wooden dowel* or stick
• Twine
• Wrapping paper
• Glue
• Sharp scissors (adult use only)

*NOTE:  Dowels are available at most craft stores.

Directions:

1. Make a cross with the two sticks by placing the shorter stick horizontally across the longer stick. Make sure that both sides of the horizontal stick are equal in width.
2. Use a dab of glue to connect the sticks at the center.  Then, wrap twine around the middle to secure the sticks.  Make sure the sticks make 4 right angles
3. This step requires an adult:  Use sharp scissors to cut a notch at each end of the sticks (4 total). Make the notch deep enough for the string to fit in
4. Cut a piece of string long enough to stretch all around the kite frame. Tie the string at the top.
5. Use twine to make a loop at the top and bottom of the kite’s spine.
6. Lay the kite frame on a piece of wrapping paper. Cut around it, leaving a ½ inch margin. Fold these edges over the string frame and tape or glue it down so that the paper is tight.
7. Cut a long piece of string and tie it to the top loop and thread it through the bottom loop.  Wrap excess string around a dowel or piece of cardboard.
8. Make a tail by adding ribbon to the bottom of the kite.  Now…go outside and fly a kite!!

Garden Apron (Made from old jeans)

Sara Perry, author of “Weekends with the Kids”, inspired this idea.  To learn about this book and others by Ms Perry visit: www.saraperry.com

You will need:

• Old jeans (waistband should fit the apron’s owner)
• Puffy Paint

Directions

1. Cut the jeans so that the entire waistband and back panel (including back pockets) remain intact.
2. Decorate with puffy paint.

Natural Easter Egg Dyes!

Thank you to our friends Lynn and Corey at www.celebrategreen for sharing these natural dyes!

For each color you will need:

• Pink/red: Beets, cranberries/cranberry juice, pomegranate juice, red grape juice, red onion skins, rhubarb stalks (chopped), raspberries, some types of tea
• Orange: Yellow onion skins (from about 12 onions), paprika, chili powder
• Yellow: Lemon peels, orange peels, carrots (shredded), cumin (ground), turmeric (ground)
• Green: Spinach, some types of tea, golden delicious apple skins (may be a green/yellow)
• Blue: Blueberries/blueberry juice, purple grape juice, red cabbage, blackberries
• Purple: Violet blossoms + 2 tsp lemon juice, hibiscus tea
• Brown: Strong black coffee, tea, dill seeds, black walnut shells

Directions:

1. For every 4 cups of water, use approx. 4 cups of fruits / veggies, 2 tablespoons of white vinegar, and 1 tablespoon of spice.  The longer you soak the egg, the darker the shade.  You can even soak the eggs overnight!
2. As always, choosing organic and local foods is preferable. Be sure to eat, use, or compost any leftovers. Note that chemicals (such as chlorine) and minerals in your water may affect the dye’s intensity.

Jenna Riggs and Beth Engelman are the creative talents and owners of Mommy on a Shoestring, a website and weekly radio show chock full of ideas on how families can live creatively and large on a small budget.

Setting Realistic Expectations for Ourselves and Kids

By Sandra Huber of the The Soulful Parent

As the excitement over New Year resolutions is fading away the talk about goals and expectations seems to lessen. Yet, many of us know that setting realistic expectations for our families is more than a New Year”s resolution.  It’s important for the health and well being of our children as well as the adults in the family.  But, how do we set realistic expectations that are fair and reasonable?  How do we know if we are doing it “right”?

One of the most important  lessons I have learned on this journey as a mom and a parent consultant is how important it is to share our values and priorities with our children, while giving them the opportunity to see us meeting our own expectations and goals.

Have clarity about your dreams, goals and expectations for you and your family

I can’t stress this enough. Goals and expectations are an important part of the health and well being of our family but we need to know what it is that we want.

I know sometimes we think  (for our own sanity!) that it is easier to choose to go with the flow.  I always remember what my grandma used to say: “Honey, only dead fish go with the flow”.

Know thyself and thy child

Communicate clearly

All relationships benefit from good communication and when it comes to setting goals and expectations within our family good communication is crucial. If we want our family members to behave in a certain way or to perform a task, it’s important that we spell out our expectations clearly.

In order for our children to be able to achieve any goals and expectations ,they not only have to be reasonable and realistic: they have to be clear, concise and understandable.  If I tell my 5 year old to be “good” because I have a headache, I am not giving her the opportunity to succeed on the task at hand. It is important to be clear when we use words like “good” or “nice”. Telling her “I need you to play quietly for 10 minutes” would better help her understand what I really want her to do.

Remember: Adults cannot read each others’ minds and neither can children.

Sandra is the “soul” and “coach” behind the Soulful Parent. She has worked in Early Intervention, Special Education and has supported many families in the road to successful parenting. She became a PCI Certified Parent Coach® because she’s deeply passionate about changing the world, one family at a time. Sandra believes that life becomes a more enjoyable journey when you lead from your strengths! She can be contacted Sandra {at} thesoulfulparent(.)com and www.thesoulfulparent.com for more information about seminars, presentations and individual coaching services.