Snow Happens!

By: Laura Rolands

Planning is important. You already know that, but sometime snow happens, literally. The heavy snow many have experienced over the last couple weeks have caused problems. We have great plans, but for many different reasons, our plans fall apart. Maybe the kids did not have school and you did not have back up day-care, you could not make it to the store, were late for work or had to shovel all weekend. Whatever the reason, heavy snow is likely to cause unexpected changes to our plans.

Don’t despair! Keep the following tips in mind to help you regroup and continue making forward progress.

Kids can help…

…Shovel

Even if your kids are young, get them involved in the shoveling by buying a shovel their size and taking them outside with you. At first it might not seem like much help if they end up playing more than shoveling. Just remember, you will be teaching them responsibility, getting them exercise and maybe getting a little bit of help. As they grow older, you can delegate more of the job directly to them.

…Make Dinner

Use the snow day as a way to get your kids more involved in making dinner. In the morning, hand them some cookbooks to select the night’s menu. During lunch, make the preparation plan and decide if you need to make a grocery store run. Of course When dinner-time arrives, get the kids involved and start cooking!

Prioritize

So you arrived a work late because you had to find alternate day care arrangements and the roads were terrible. You probably have a great planner from Families With Purpose and planned your day yesterday. Now, you don’t feel like you can get it all done with a shortened work day. Look at your to do list and pick your highest priority task. Delay everything else until tomorrow when you have time to regroup and focus on the highest priority - you might make more progress than you think!

Get Organized

If you haven’t had time to make a plan to attack your clutter, today will be the perfect day. Make your plan and start working it today. Getting the kids involved can have the same benefits I mentioned in the shoveling example. The earlier you start, the easier this will be as they get older.

Have Fun

Sometimes we need to relish in the idea of a snow day. It can be a built-in reason to have fun and let all of our other responsibilities slide! There is a reason that kids love them so much (even more than weekends!). Make it your mission to discover what makes it so fun. You will make some great memories with your kids!

No matter what your challenge when your plans get interrupted, take a deep breath and give yourself a chance to re-group. You just might enjoy yourself!

Traits of a Frazzle-Free Mom

By: Mandi Ehman

School, work, hobbies, family, friends, volunteering, after-school activities, homeschooling and more — there’s no doubt that today’s mom has more than enough on her plate to keep her busy. Sometimes the many obligations vying for our attention become too much and we need to take a step back and reprioritize, choosing which activities are worth our attention and which we need to let go of. Other times, what we really need is to come up with a plan to better manage our obligations and activities with grace and ease.

Although I don’t always manage to pull it off myself, here are five traits of a frazzle-free mom to help you balance everything on your plate:

1. She’s organized.

Organizing your day as well as your physical surroundings means you won’t be wasting time or energy trying to remember what is on your calendar or to-do list or trying to find something you need. We’ve all had those days where the schedule is full and everything needs to run smoothly, only to realize we’ve forgotten to write down an obligation. Trying to remember everything that needs your attention or wasting time searching for your car keys and wallet is a surefire way to send your day into a tailspin.

Whether you use a physical planner, an online calendar or just a simple pad of paper, write everything down. Storing it all in your brain will inevitably result in a stressed out mama and forgotten tasks.

If your home or office is unorganized and chaotic, you’re wasting time and energy on stuff – finding it, moving it, thinking about it — instead of being able to focus on the important things. I know figuring out where to start can be overwhelming, so start by decluttering. Take two trash bags or boxes and fill one with things that can be thrown away and one with things to be given away. Try not to overanalyze each decision too much, but make it a game to see how quickly you can fill up the boxes.

Once you’ve decluttered, start by organizing a small area, such as a desk drawer or a shelf in a closet. Continue organizing one small area at a time until you feel good about your space and then work on maintaining it by putting things back where they belong after using them.

2. She’s prepared.

My motto in life is, “Expect the best but prepare for the worst.” Life with kids is unpredictable at best, but you can be prepared for those unexpected moments when the baby spits up all over herself (and you) or when your preschooler has an accident after being fully potty trained for years or when you’re stuck in traffic and everyone is hungry and antsy.

Keep your diaper bag stocked and ready to go by the door so that you’re not stuffing things in it on your way to a play date or lesson. Plan your menu ahead of time so that you’re not staring blankly into your pantry at 5:30. Obviously “unexpected” means you can’t anticipate every situation, but the better prepared you are in general, the more likely you’ll be able to come up with some way to handle whatever comes your way.

3. She prioritizes.

There are only so many hours in a day, and sometimes we just have to choose from among a list of “good” activities to ensure the “best” ones are getting our attention. Think about what your priorities are as a mother so that you can make sure you’re focusing on the most important ones first. I know I end up frazzled and unhappy when my priorities get out of whack and I let the most important things slip. Your priorities may be mothering and homemaking, but they also may include running a business, writing a book or volunteering. The important part is listing your priorities and making decisions based on them rather than getting caught up in the “tyranny of the urgent”.

4. She knows her pressure points.

What little things drive you nuts? Fly Lady says to always go to bed with a clean sink, and it’s something I strive for in my own life as well, but even more importantly, I make my bed every morning. It only takes a minute or two, but it’s amazing how big of an impact such a simple activity has on my day. When it’s not done, I feel overwhelmed, stressed out and out of control, but when it is done, it feels like I can face anything.

Your pressure points may be different than mine, but the key is figuring out which things impact your mood and stress level so that you can give those things priority even when you don’t have time for the rest.

5. She strives for excellence but NOT perfection.

There is no such thing as a perfect mother, and trying to live up to impossible standards will leave you discouraged and frustrated. However, this doesn’t mean that you should throw all standards out the window or never strive to do better. Rather, do everything with excellence so that you’re less likely to have to redo something a second time. Whether it’s keeping house, volunteering on a committee or running a business, do your best at every task. It doesn’t mean you’ll be perfect, so don’t beat yourself up when you make mistakes, but rather look at each mistake or failure as a learning opportunity and a chance to do better next time.

Mandi Ehman is a work-at-home mom to four spunky little girls. She believes that organizing only lasts if you do it your way – to fit your needs, your preferences and your lifestyle – and she shares organizing and time management tips at Organizing Your Way.

Creating Bedtime Routines

One of the concerns that parents often ask me about is the trouble they have getting their kids to go to bed and stay in bed at night.

Nothing gets a parent more exhausted and worn out than night after night of no sleep. The truth is that when we think of the idea of going to sleep, it sounds like a tempting proposition: moms rarely feel that they get enough of it. They long for a good night of deep rest as a traveler in the desert longs for fresh water! But for our young kids, the idea of getting to sleep is not nearly as appealing. It means the fun has to stop and most kids will let you know of the disappointment via tantrums and crying.

Most children are ready to start a bedtime routine as early as 6 months. It’s important to know how much sleep is necessary and age appropriate so your expectations for your children can be realistic. Also, have you noticed if your child is a natural “night owl” or an “early riser”? Some children show a preference early on.

Peace mind only comes when we have a plan of action, realizing there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Here are some simple tips to consider:

1. Make the hour before bedtime quiet, peaceful and an opportunity to slow down. Make it fun! Include things that your child loves to do: read his favorite book or tell him his favorite story or play his favorite music. Make the idea of going to bed appealing!
2. Have a clear routine that your child understands: get a warm bath, put pajamas on, brush teeth, read story. Whatever is important to you and your child should be part of a consistent routine you follow most nights.
3. Take the opportunity of closeness that bedtime affords. Our children grow so fast and need less and less of our intervention at bedtime. Until very recently, our 8-year-old would ask us to lie down in bed with her after the lights went out. She has now asked us to let her go to sleep on her own. I can’t tell you how much I miss that little “snuggling” time but I knew it wasn’t going to last forever. I am glad I enjoyed while it lasted!

The bottom line is: rest when you can even if that means chores wait. Stick to the routine you’ve created and be consistent. It may take a little time, but in the end, it will pay off.

Sandra is the “soul” and “coach” behind the Soulful Parent. She has worked in Early Intervention, Special Education and has supported many families in the road to successful parenting. She became a PCI Certified Parent Coach® because she’s deeply passionate about changing the world, one family at a time. Sandra believes that life becomes a more enjoyable journey when you lead from your strengths! She can be contacted Sandra {at} thesoulfuparent(.)com and www.thesoulfulparent.com for more information about seminars, presentations and individual coaching services.

Plan First; De-clutter Later

Planning is your first step to getting a fresh start with your clutter.  My goal is to inspire you to set goals that are meaningful and develop a good plan to achieve them.  You will then, in turn, be successful at winning your clutter challenges!  Do you look at your clutter and think, “I’ll never get this under control”?  Take the opportunity this week to consider the new year as your fresh start to getting your clutter under control.  In order to best conquer your clutter, you need a plan and accountability to that plan.

Before you start developing your plan, spend some time thinking about what challenges you have regarding clutter.  By asking yourself some open ended questions, you can ensure that you are going after the right challenges.  A key consideration is that your plan will be more effective if you are working on the right challenges.

• Where does clutter impact me the most?
• Whose clutter tops my list of clutter challenges?
• How much time do I need to clear my clutter?
• What kind of system would help me over the long term?

After you understand your challenges, set a goal for getting your clutter under control.  You are probably familiar with SMART goals.  I recommend you set SMART goals to effectively tackle your clutter.  If you are not familiar, SMART goals must be Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely.  Take a minute and review the following two goals and decide which one is SMARTer:

• I want to get control of my clutter this year.
• By a week from today, I will remove the clutter from my desk, file it and develop a process to maintain my clutter-free desk for the next two months.

Okay, maybe I made it too obvious, but I hope the second goal helps to illustrate the important elements of a SMART goal.  After you write your goals, review them against the SMART criteria and revise them if necessary.

When you have developed your goal, it is time for your action plan.  When developing your plan, I recommend a few key steps to apply.  Keep the steps small and simple.  After you have developed your plan, post it somewhere to remind you of what you have committed to do.

START!  Pick a day in the next week when you will start your action plan.  It does not matter when you start.  If the whole process seems too overwhelming, take one small step each day.

Stay accountable to your plan.  Chances are that it may be difficult to do this on your own.  Find a coach to help you keep on track.  Your coach can be a friend, spouse, co-worker, significant other or even a professional coach.  The point is to have someone to help you stay accountable to your plan.  If you commit to someone besides just yourself, you are more likely to complete the actions.

Good luck as you start and implement your plan.  Let me know if you have any questions.

Laura Rolands is the founder of LSR Coaching and Consulting, LLC. She is a coach whose passion is to support, lead and inspire independence and success for people who have either been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD or who are facing other attention-related challenges. Her clients include individuals with attention-related challenges and/or their parents.  You can reach her through www.MyAttentionCoach.com.

Top Eight Healthy New Year Habits for Families

As the New Year begins, many families try to begin with a clean slate and resolve to create healthier habits.  The holidays are often a time when unhealthy habits are created by indulging in sugary treats and fattening foods and drinks, which are plentiful between Thanksgiving and the New Year.  Everyone can benefit from a fresh start in the New Year whether the goal is to lose weight, improve health, or just to live a healthy lifestyle.  Here are the top eight ways to create healthier family habits in the New Year.

1. Make it a group effort: Involve everyone in the healthy New Year plan to prevent “a new sherriff in town” scenario.  Sit down as a family, decide which foods need to be banned from the house, and establish which healthy foods would be suitable alternatives.  Clean out the refrigerator and pantry together as a team effort, eliminating sugar laden and processed foods.  Go to the grocery store as a family to choose fruits, vegetables, and whole grains to restock the kitchen with the agreed upon healthy choices.
2. Create a meal plan: All successful endeavors begin with a carefully formulated plan.  Decide ahead of time what type of healthy meals will work for your family, and request meal suggestions from everyone.  Consider having a regular routine, such as Sunday leftovers on Monday, Taco Tuesdays, crock-pot Wednesdays, stir-fry Thursdays, etc.  Be sure to plan for snacks as well, such as fruit and veggies at predetermined times like after school or in the afternoons on weekends.
3. Cook more often: By making meals at home, it’s possible to choose the leanest cuts of meat and fresh vegetables.  Restaurants often use too much salt and sugar and rely on canned and processed foods, which have a negative impact on health.  Kids are more likely to eat foods that they have had an opportunity to choose and prepare, so include everyone in the meal preparation.
4. Start each day with breakfast: Eating breakfast every day is important for many health reasons.  Many studies have shown benefits to eating a morning meal, such as better mental performance, eating less over the course of the day, and improved weight control.  If time is an issue, make breakfast simple with a delicious protein shake, or a serving of fruit and a protein source such as eggs or nuts.
5. Watch portion sizes: A healthy plate should be made up primarily of salad, vegetables, fruit, and whole grains.  The smallest portion should be a lean protein choice, which should be around three ounces.  Experiment with using smaller plates and eating the healthiest foods at a meal first.
6. Eat together: Sitting down to dinner as a family is an important way to model healthy eating behaviors to children.  Family meals are an opportunity to bond and connect.
7. Include exercise: Physical activity is an important part of a healthy lifestyle.  Be sure to include an exercise plan into your family health plan.  Suggestions include daily walks together, bike riding if the weather allows, or possibly doing a workout class on the television.
8. Keep everyone motivated: Rewards are a powerful source of motivation, so choose a reward that everyone will look forward to with excitement.  Choose a few small rewards that can be earned on a more frequent basis, such as a family trip to the movies, iTunes cards, or an activity such as bowling.  A more substantial reward such as a weekend trip or a family health club membership should be determined to keep everyone inspired for a six to eight week time period, which is long enough to create healthy habits.

There may be some resistance initially to revamping unhealthy habits.  By including everyone in the decision, planning, and execution of a healthier routine, it will be more likely to have cooperation from everyone.  Remember to create a plan and involve the kids in creating menus and meal plans.  Fun rewards will keep everyone motivated and inspired to have a healthy New Year.

Cheryl Heppard of www.MichiganHealthCoach.com is a board certified health counselor who assists clients who are struggling with weight loss or health issues.  Her website has free resources such as printable recipes, menus, and meal plans, as well as free monthly health tips to subscribers.

Stop Clutter Dead in Its Tracks

Clutter, clutter, clutter.  This is a word that can make you feel anxious, overwhelmed, disorganized and frustrated.  Clutter can create greater stress for your family, as if raising a family is not enough.  Clutter makes it difficult to dust a desktop, vacuum a floor: it makes you work harder not smarter.  Clutter will cost you time and money - lots of it.

As a professional organizer, I am often asked: what is the best way to control clutter?  I often respond: by stopping it dead it its tracks!  It is best to avoid having clutter before it becomes clutter.  So if you find yourself with a pile of junk mail, permission slips, bills and coupons sitting on your kitchen counter, make sure that these items don’t even get there.  Here is my advice:

• As you go through your mail, place the emptied envelopes, flyers and junk mail in the recycle bin. Shred any items that contain personal information (address, account info etc.)
• File your bills in an accordion file holder
• Fill out permission slips, diarize the event in your family calendar and place the slips in your kid’s agenda to take back to school
• Place coupons in a small, portable accordion holder that slips into your purse or with your re-useable - eco-friendly bags!

Can you see where I am going with this? If everything has a place, then there is no need to have clutter on the counter.

I usually suggest to clients to use these five useful tips help get them conquer clutter.

Tip # 1 - Take 5, 10 or 15…

Take 5 minutes to clear some clutter. Maybe it is a junk drawer, part of your linen closet or a 3×3 foot section in your basement or garage. Take 5 minutes to tackle a project. Five minutes may turn to 10 or 15 minutes but you may surprise yourself and keep going. Build up to 1 hour and then maybe 1/2 day. Pick a project, set a time to tackle a task and stick to it. Don’t take on too much or you may become overwhelmed but DO keep at it until the time is up.

Tip # 2 - Have a vision - make a plan

Take the time to figure out what you want from your space - this is a VISION. Ask yourself: What would this space look like without all this clutter?  If you are using a guest bedroom as a catch all or dumping ground or a have an entire basement as playroom but you want a home office, envision what the room would look like when you finish your project. Make a simple floor plan. Figure out what can stay, what has to go and what has to change in order to make your vision a REALITY!

Tip # 3 - Use a system

Use a system that will help you accomplish you goals and get rid of the clutter. F-A-S-T is a simple system used by “Clean Sweep” host, best-selling author and Organizing Guru, Peter Walsh.

• Fix a time and stick too it
• Anything not used in the last twelve months has to go
• Someone else’s stuff has to go back to them
• Trash unusable items and garbage definitely have to go

A de-cluttering system has to be simple. Use 5 sorting bins labeled ‘keep’, ‘donate’, trash’, ‘recycle’ and ’somewhere else’. Quickly scan the room in a clockwise manner and toss the items in the bins where they belong. This system is effective and can help you get started - FAST!

Tip # 4 - One in one out

Using the ‘one-in-one-out’ rule can be very effective.  How does this simple system work?  When you purchase a new item, you retire another one.  So if you have bought a great pair of black pumps, get rid of the other ones that you haven’t used in ages.  Place a shopping bag in your closet so you can donate ‘retired’ items.

Before it even becomes clutter, make sure you think about what you are letting into your closet/home/life?  Do you need more than one?  Do you have space to put this new found object?  Do you ’see’ where it will fit into your home?

Tip # 5 - A place for everything and everything in its place

If everything has a place, it is much easier to control clutter.  If something is not in its place, you will know right away.  Give items a home so your family knows where items can be found and sent to.  Finding a permanent home for items can be a very difficult task for some people but in the long run, it makes life less complicated.

You can use these few steps to stop clutter in its tracks.

Margarita Ibbott owns Downshifting - Professional Organizing Solutions and has been a professional organizer in London, Ontario, Canada for over 4 years.  She loves working with families to control their clutter.  You can find her musing on clutter, organizing and family life at www.downshiftingpos.blogspot.com.

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#frazzlefree This is Week 4 of our 8 Weeks to a Frazzle Free Christmas.  You can find complete day by day details of the plan as well as printables and additional resources at http://www.familieswithpurpose.com/.

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